The Blessing in Pain

My cousin was murdered. It's a weird sentence to say or write. She didn't just die. It wasn't illness or an accident that took her from us. It was the decision of another person to end her life. She was murdered a week ago. I have had a whole week to try to process this information and I still am having trouble getting my brain to accept it. No matter the amount of spiritual and self-help work you do, you can't always accept everything that happens.

I could make this post about my anger. It could be about how angry I am that our country has not done enough to stop this kind of thing from happening. I am angry about the state of gun laws, of violence against women, about the lack of support and protection for women in dangerous circumstances, the lack of mental health opportunities, and how voices are silenced. I am angry at the man who took her life and then his own. I have even been angry at God and all the powers of the Universe. Being spiritual doesn't stop you from being angry at times.

I could make this post about grief. How, no matter who you are, you will have versions of the stages of grief when you experience loss. That grief is not just feeling sad but feeling everything. You cycle through anger, sadness, numbness, peace, joy, and then back again. In fact, it's like being bounced around from emotion to emotion with no sort of order to follow. Grief is an experience that you move through and just keep moving through and it keeps changing. No amount of guidance or meditation will stop this.

Instead, I want to talk about pain. We try to stop the pain in ourselves and in others all the time. If we see someone crying or expressing discomfort, we ask how we can make it stop. We try to stop our own pain. We use drugs (prescription or not), alcohol, food, entertainment, sex, and whatever will shift our mood for a moment to escape it. We want to numb out and tune out. This is a natural response. Pain often means danger or death or a sign that something is wrong. Of course the natural response is to avoid it. Pain is also a doorway for us to walk through. Every painful experience has led me to new growth with my soul, deeper meaning in my life, a new understanding of myself and the world around me, and the birth of something new.

Pain brings truth, clarity, and brings us right into the present moment. That can sometimes be the cause of the pain. If we are in denial and avoiding, then we don't even realize what the pain is about. We might blame others or pretend to be happy when inside we feel like we our drowning. When we allow ourselves to sit with the pain, we can start to release and find peace. It is often our resistance and fighting or shoving the pain down that causes the pain to be so harsh. Emotional pain and physical pain can be better if you can relax into it. Let the tears flow. Let yourself wail if you need to. Open yourself to release the pain and birth forward something new.

The pain is a blessing, too. It means we are alive! It means we are experiencing life at its fullest. It means we are being honest with ourselves and living in alignment with our true feelings. The pain is only temporary when we feel it. This allows it to morph and change. It is holding onto pain and trying not to feel it that keeps it around forever. That said, there are some pains that will never fully leave, but we can embrace them as part of ourselves and make peace still. So, please feel your pain, embrace it, make peace with it, and watch it transform you.

2019 New Year Message from The Fairies

I have spent a lot of time the last week doing 12 month oracle readings for people (if you want to find out how to get your personalized reading, click here), and I noticed some re-occurring patterns of energy for 2019. I thought I should get the Fairies’ take on it, but I wanted to share how I was seeing the energy flow first. January is a tying up of 2018 and/or a preview for 2019. Some are experiencing one or the other and some are experiencing both. Pay attention and tie up those loose ends. Whatever issues come up will be probably a cycle for the year for you. April is when the energy gets turned on full blast. This is a turning point, a time when things really manifest in the physical, you get clarity, and/or you start the big journey of the year. The energy heats up in July and August. By October, it mellows again and has a bit of a magical sparkle to it. Things flow a little easier. The end of the year is kind of a bang, but not as intense as April. More like a completion and/or greater clarity. I personally find that knowing the energy flow helps me navigate the ups and downs of my personal life. I hope it helps you also. Here is what the Fairies have to say about 2019:

This year will be an opening of the eyes. The chaos of the last two years will start to make sense. Spend January releasing and grieving. Grieve the end of your victim-hood. Grieve the end of your old way of being. Grieve the relationships you had to let go of and the fantasy you had about the future. 2019 has no room for these.

This year is about tending to the garden and then harvesting. This is a year of action and less struggle. You planted the seeds and now the sprouts are emerging from the dark. You will need patience because the harvest doesn't really come till the end of the year. You have been energetically pushing against a heavy cloud for the last couple years. That cloud lifts in the spring and you start to feel the ease. Especially if you did the inner work in 2018. You will have things magically coming together. You will still be working hard in 2019, but it will produce more results than before.

Again, the word for the year is action. You must take action on your dreams and goals. The Universe will bring forward more manifestations for you. Amazing breakthroughs that you never even dreamed possible will happen. Stay open to the possibilities while you stay present.

Approach this year with curiosity. You may have goals and ideas about where you are headed but you will be surprised at how this expands your awareness and your knowing of self. Last year was about inner expansion. Clearing out the old within to be more centered. This year is about expanding that knowing into the physical world and expanding your perception as well as the perception of you.

Open your eyes.

Take action.

~ The Fairies

Solstice Message from the Fairies

The Fairies came forward in ritual tonight and wanted me to share a message on the solstice.

“We Fairies have watched Humanity struggle in their paradox this year. Your reality is one of contrasting opposites, yet you seek one truth. You have opposing ideas and beliefs, yet you wish to unite and love each other as one people. It can be difficult to long for the connection of others while also trying to not lose yourself. Your internal conflict manifests as outward conflict. Both are being sorted out. This year you were brought a lot of clarity. Now that you know who you are and what you want to create, it is time to create it. Stop looking for the perfect time, scenario, or person to make it happen. You need to decide in your heart it is time and do what appears in front of you. Stop giving your power away to intangible circumstances. We are putting this call out for those who are ready to hear it. The time is now!

We are ready to aid in co-creating the new reality of Humanity. It is up to you to show up and do your part. Today is the least light in a day, but it is when the light grows brighter every day from now on. This is very symbolic for your Earth right now. Humanity has come through what many would describe as a very dark time, but it has hit its peak. Now you will start to have more light each day. That light comes from all of you who are reading this. The dark and light have no meaning unless they are witnessed. You must now turn your face to the light and focus. You must shine your light and witness it in the world.

Do you BELIEVE? That is what is important. You do not have to believe in us. You need to believe in yourself. You need to believe your reality has shifted and is ready for you, to support you, and to become something more peaceful and fun. Actively seek out what is peaceful and fun. That feeds your soul, opens you to the flow, and creates more peace and fun in your reality. Call on us. We are here to help.”

The Fairy Council

Relationships

This started as a post on Facebook. It had so much interaction that I decided to expand it into a blog.

I just watched an advertisement that made me worry for other females. If a man is ignoring you, showing signs of disinterest, or wanting to break up with you, trying to find a way to “trick” him into it is not going to benefit you. This woman was selling a text message system that will “make him obsessed and addicted” to you. Who wants that?! Someone obsessively calling and texting you is not fun. No matter how much you like them, it will wear on you. We live in this society that makes women think that they want someone who focuses only on them, but someone without their own life has nothing to share with you.

How about we stop pushing stereotypes that women have to manipulate men to try and control them into being committed? Or the stereotype that men are sex-crazed fickle beings who always want something new and shiny? It's like women are supposed to find the best beast and trick him into a cage. Is that really the way you want to start a relationship?

Also, the reference cases that she used said things like “he was cute and a doctor, total package right?” and described another as “handsome, rich, and made all her friends jealous” as if these were describing the perfect man. Is he funny, kind, smart, self-aware, socially aware, or do they even like each other? I don't know. She didn't cover that. I think both sexes are sent the message that being sexually desirable is the most important thing. For women, that is generally physical appearance and for men it is about money and status and/or physical appearance.

Our society loves to push the idea that once you get someone to commit romantically to you that you're happy and your life is fixed. Plus, this should be the focus of your life if you’re not in a relationship. It’s such BS. If we spent half as much energy and time, as a society, on self-development that we do on how to snag a partner, we would be a different society.

I will give you a free system that will totally work on any man or woman. First find one you like for them. Not because they are hot, rich, or connected. But one you actually like to be around. Then talk openly and honestly with them. Mean what you say. Now here is the BIG secret: listen to them. Like actually hear what they are saying, then take that at face value and respect it. Don’t look for hidden meanings or games. Even if they are doing that, you don’t want them, so move on.

Bottom line: let integrity and honesty be your game plan and don’t let others treat you less than fabulous. Desperation will come through no matter how expertly crafted your text message.

Gratitude

In the US, we are celebrating Thanksgiving this week. When we talk about gratitude and giving thanks, the focus is often on appreciating what we have. People say things like, “I know I should be grateful for what I have, so many have less,” as if this is a limiting belief to stop your dreaming. Gratitude should not come from a place of martyrdom or low self-worth. Gratitude is giving thanks for what we have so we can open up to more. Gratitude is saying thank you and opening ourselves to allowing more to blessing to come. If you are only grateful because other people are homeless or other people are sick or other people have less, then you are not being grateful. Gratitude is not a comparison. Gratitude is a celebration of what you have. You should feel so abundant that you share with those around you. When you see lack, it is not to compare your life with theirs, but to see where you can help fill a void.

Likewise, don't view others’ good fortune from a place of lack. Instead of feeling envious, you should celebrate others’ accomplishments. If they did something, so can you. When you witness good fortune, goals are met, or something powerful is created, it is brought into your awareness as a possibility. Before, you didn't know how to connect with that thought or feeling. Once you know someone that has done something, you can recreate it in your own life.

Here is what the Fairies have to say about gratitude:

“2018 is the year for seed planting. Gratitude is how you feed those plants. We have told you about the energetic wave or arc that you are currently riding. Yes, you are still in some of the chaos, but it has also been a foundation year. All of Humanity has started setting up their new way of being. All of Humanity has planted the seeds of the reality they are creating. When you truly connect with gratitude, you harmonize with the feeling of limitless possibility. You know the Universe is supplying you with all the support and resources you need. When it doesn't look that way, you might need to shift your perspective. We know there are humans truly struggling in poverty, homelessness, and hunger. We know there are many being displaced by natural disasters or who have lost all their material possessions. We do not want to negate Human suffering. We want you to see that gratitude is an energy that all can connect with. Gratitude, and that limitless feeling, is not about Earthly success or material possessions. Gratitude is about the miracle of your life and the magic that lives in you. Stop worrying about being enough to receive and instead love the fact that every cell in your body knows exactly what to do to keep you alive. Stop over thinking the experiences in your life and instead love your brain and its powerful perception of everything around you. Stop wondering what you deserve or if you have worked hard enough and instead love yourself. Love yourself for being alive. Love yourself for making it this far. Have gratitude for yourself and every challenge you have faced and every obstacle you have overcome.”

Finding Myself

There are dark times on every path. These last few years seem to be heavy with the dark moments. I feel like I have lost a bit of myself and my soul over the last few years. My mother had two brain surgeries, one planned and one emergency. Don't get me wrong, we experienced miracles in the last few years. She almost died multiple times. We weren't sure she would be able to even talk again after her fall and brain bleed. A lot of healing was done by many healers, myself, and doctors and nurses. But in all of that, there were a lot of nights sleeping for only a few hours in a chair or on a lumpy cot. Nights of no sleep due to worry or due to keeping mom calm while dealing with hallucinations. Nights of being on call in case she needed help or something happened. Nights away from my husband and children. The medical procedures all had new things for me to learn for care at home. It seemed like there was always a new stress or condition or procedure to prepare for. I recently heard this described as trying to drink from a fire house. I think that describes it well.

Finally mom got sable. She still needs constant care due to poor eyesight and inability to walk, but she is stable. So, in February, I had a hysterectomy to deal with Adenomyosis. I couldn't take the physical pain of that anymore. Going through that recovery process, I realized that I did not have much support. I also realized that I had lost me along the way. Between my own pain and the stress of my mother's health, I had become less me. I liked to have fun and be social, but instead I was isolating and stressed all the time. My kids had lost that mom. My daughter even made comments about how I was grumpy or sad or serious all the time.

I can sit here and blame situations or people, but it was my doing. I stopped fighting for me. I kept giving away bits of myself and not asking for anything in return. I knew I had to shift. I'm still in this shift. I'm slowly reclaiming myself back, but I am allowing myself space to grow into more. This last week, I went to a Conference for my direct sales business. It was powerful and fun. The most important part was I felt like my old self. I was being silly, loud, dancing, singing, and having a good time.

Yes, we all have the dark times that make us want to give up or sell our souls. It's easy to let go of hope and cave in to the darkness. Instead, I invite you to rest. This can be sleep or just letting your soul rest. Don't let anyone define this for you. Whatever brings you joy and eases your soul, embrace it! Then start reprogramming your brain. Question everything if you have to. What are your motives? Why do you react the way you do? What do you really want? Help yourself believe once again in yourself. Find your sparkle!

Message to Humanity from The Fairies

I have shared this many times over the years. I feel it is fitting to be the first Blog post on the new site.

 “The energy of who you are, is not limited by the forms it takes. It is still all a part of the One. The human form that you are taking is the best way to get to the pure form. Humans have this thought process that somehow they are less than other Beings, say us (fairies) or the dragons, because they are more dense, because they aren’t as aligned with the God energy all the time. The truth is that the beings who have chosen to be Fairy, to be Angelic, to be Dragon, to be Ascended Master, whatever, and hold that form, they now are just that energy. A very pure state of it, but they can not pull from the other energies.

A Fairy can not channel through Angelic energy. It is just not possible for us, because we have chosen a certain vibration, a certain fluid way of being. So, in our fluidity, in our vibrational energy pattern being raised, however you want to look at it, we have lost that ability. You need to be more dense in order to open to the lighter side. Air can not hold water the way that a cup can. So, though you are denser, more structured in your way of being in your earth plane, it is also that structuring that has allowed you the ability to pull forward many energies, many ways of being and embody them and bring them to the earth plane.

Why do you think all of us treasure humanity so? Humanity it is the place that all the energies blend back together. It is like it starts at the One and gets spread out in a spectrum through all these different avenues. And it is through humanity that it can pull those energies back together to the One again, the other side of the spectrum. There is a way to become so light, so open, that you lose the individuality and become part of the One. There is a way to get so focused that all the individualities get brought together into one Individuality, and to the One.

That is why it is so important for us that humanity continues to open. We can work with the Angels, but we can not combine our energy with their energy unless there is a human there to do it. We can work with the Dragons, but we can not combine our energy with them unless there is a human to do it.

It is a great honor to be human. Stop trying to be something else. Humanity has too many judgments about itself. It needs to love itself. Humanity is a very honorable thing. A human being is a very honorable thing to be. Yes, you have the dark side. You have the polarity, the duality. But that is what helps anchor you. That is what helps keep the denser part of you which is what really allows you to open and bring all of these energies together, to the cup that holds the etheric waters.

It is the human form that is able to blend all the energies together and pull them forward. It is not about people wanting to be more Fairy. It isn’t about understanding our Realm and who we are and trying to go there. It is for humanity to understand who they are and their important part in this expanded universe of the many realms and the many beings.

It is wonderful to be a human at this time. There are some amazing things going on. As a human you get to experience all of them! All the great work being done by all the beings all around you! You are sitting at the spiritual buffet of life!

It is time for humanity to get it! Why all the beings say they love them so much. Why we talk about how important it is for them to keep moving forward. Why they have been chosen to be these wonderful beings called human.

It is not some lowly form. It gives the filters, the ability to see the beauty of everything and to pull from many places, many energies and experience them. Watching humanity sometimes is like watching the great master violin player walk around in beggar’s clothing. Not playing a violin. Not sharing its gifts with the world. Not taking care and honoring the talent that lays there.

We offer you the violin. Play it! Bring all your talent forward to the earth and see what an amazing talented being you are by just naturally being you, this highly evolved being called human.”

-The Fairies