healing

Miracles

I have had people ask why I don't have testimonies on my site or talk about what has happened for others through my healing work. The truth, is I want every experience to be your experience. It doesn't matter what happens for another, only what happens for you. I have experienced miracles in healing sessions. I have had clients, friends, and family that have healed broken bones, headaches, migraines, insomnia, heart problems, allergies, rashes, and many emotional crisis. I also have had clients, friends, and family work on those issues and still struggle with them. I get to be a witness to the healing and help direct it some, but it is that person and God making it happen. Not me.

The biggest miracle I have witnessed was when my mother fell. She had a brain bleed. We rushed her to the hospital and while there, she had a grand mal seizure. She was air lifted to a hospital in Seattle. They did emergency brain surgery and took a half a cup of blood off her brain. After the surgery, they had her in a drug-induced coma because she was having constant nonclinical seizures. My dad had stayed with her the first night. The second night, I went to relieve him. I brought her big quartz crystal and laid it next to her in the bed. I contacted multiple healing circles I knew and asked for prayers and light sent. I spent the whole night doing Reiki and ThetaHealing. I didn't care if any nurses or doctors saw me and wondered what I was doing. The seizures stopped and they stopped the drug-induced coma. The doctors told us the outlook was grim and they were not sure if she would live. If she did, they weren't sure when she would be able to talk or use her limbs, if ever. They didn't know how much brain damage she had experienced. They didn't want us to be surprised if she was stuck in the hospital for a long time. I kept going. I just went into full healer mode. The next day she woke up, confused about why she was tied down and why there were tubes in her. I started talking to her and explaining what had been happening. She understood. She was totally conscious. Within a day, she had total control of her arms and legs. She had a lot that needed to heal, but within a couple months, she was completely back. Every doctor that had her as a patient has told her she was a miracle.

This is also why I talk about using both western medicine and alternative measures. I don't know that I could have stopped the brain bleed. Anything is possible, but I'm not willing to take that gamble. Also, the body is able to heal itself miraculously. When we hold space for God and witness it and trust, healing can happen.

Finding Myself

There are dark times on every path. These last few years seem to be heavy with the dark moments. I feel like I have lost a bit of myself and my soul over the last few years. My mother had two brain surgeries, one planned and one emergency. Don't get me wrong, we experienced miracles in the last few years. She almost died multiple times. We weren't sure she would be able to even talk again after her fall and brain bleed. A lot of healing was done by many healers, myself, and doctors and nurses. But in all of that, there were a lot of nights sleeping for only a few hours in a chair or on a lumpy cot. Nights of no sleep due to worry or due to keeping mom calm while dealing with hallucinations. Nights of being on call in case she needed help or something happened. Nights away from my husband and children. The medical procedures all had new things for me to learn for care at home. It seemed like there was always a new stress or condition or procedure to prepare for. I recently heard this described as trying to drink from a fire house. I think that describes it well.

Finally mom got sable. She still needs constant care due to poor eyesight and inability to walk, but she is stable. So, in February, I had a hysterectomy to deal with Adenomyosis. I couldn't take the physical pain of that anymore. Going through that recovery process, I realized that I did not have much support. I also realized that I had lost me along the way. Between my own pain and the stress of my mother's health, I had become less me. I liked to have fun and be social, but instead I was isolating and stressed all the time. My kids had lost that mom. My daughter even made comments about how I was grumpy or sad or serious all the time.

I can sit here and blame situations or people, but it was my doing. I stopped fighting for me. I kept giving away bits of myself and not asking for anything in return. I knew I had to shift. I'm still in this shift. I'm slowly reclaiming myself back, but I am allowing myself space to grow into more. This last week, I went to a Conference for my direct sales business. It was powerful and fun. The most important part was I felt like my old self. I was being silly, loud, dancing, singing, and having a good time.

Yes, we all have the dark times that make us want to give up or sell our souls. It's easy to let go of hope and cave in to the darkness. Instead, I invite you to rest. This can be sleep or just letting your soul rest. Don't let anyone define this for you. Whatever brings you joy and eases your soul, embrace it! Then start reprogramming your brain. Question everything if you have to. What are your motives? Why do you react the way you do? What do you really want? Help yourself believe once again in yourself. Find your sparkle!